3 reasons Gage’s “top 6 candy bars” list is total bullshit

I get it, people are entitled to their own opinion, thats completely fine. There are just sometimes you got to call people out on their shitty opinions. Earlier this week, BudHole posted a completely garbage list of top 6 candy bars. Here are my top 3 reason why that list was complete trash.

#3

It included 3 Musketeers

Let me preface this by saying I am a large human being. This, in theory, makes my opinion on sweet treats that much more valid. 3 musketeers is a waste off shelf space. By November 5th my Halloween candy would be gone, except for almond joys and 3 musketeers. The fact this bar made the list over the likes of Baby Ruth, What-cha-ma-call-it, Crunch, Krackle, or Payday is honestly atrocious.

#2

100 grand is a top 3 bar

The only thing more blasphemous then putting 3 musketeers on the list is leaving 100 grand off of it. While it may not be as mainstream as other bars, the gooey, crunchy goodness of 100 grand is undeniable. It would seem hard for it not to medal in anyone’s list, so for it to have missed the list is a complete oversight on Gage’s behalf.

#1

Snickers is the clear cut favorite

Unless you have a peanut allergy, you know well and good that Snickers is elite when it comes to candy bars. It is the Tom Brady of candy. Kit-Kats are great, no disrespect, but that’s like saying Patty Mahomes is the best quarterback, just because he’s tickled your fancy as of late. It will take years of dominance for any candy bar to overtake Snickers.